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Aussie Shiraz
Sunday, August 28, 2005

Am still feeling like absolute crap. Also am v.disappointed as bottom is now resembling two over-inflated balloons stuffed into well fitting pants....sigh.

Due to hormonal abnormalities I will now recommence using my old site Aussie Mama.

Friday, August 19, 2005

Pregnancy is a time for joy and beauty, it's a time when life is wonderous and magic......but not for me...I am really struggling with morning sickness, some days I can barely keep down all my expensive chocolate. I cannot read more than five lines of writing, (one on the computer) without my head spinning and my stomach churning. For this reason I won't be posting for a while...I might add something from time to time....nausea permitting. I'll try to pick up again when the sickness eases.....Until then...

Am not enjoying being pregnant as am subject to bouts of nausea, unreasonable grumpiness and fat bottom. Also... hate husband....hate argumentitive teenagers.....hate smell of McDonalds as have to pass every day enroute to buy chocolate......Hate fat bottom too..

Wednesday, August 17, 2005

Where have all the firemen gone......haven't seen my hunky fire officer for ages, probably because I am a chocolate addicted, washed out ex-alcoholic.......


Anyway, in answer to some questions, well actually one question, I am 6 weeks pregnant, I was pregnant before, but had a miscarriage at 6 weeks. Then in some act of madness I decided to try again and so here I am....The plus side, I have a baby growing, the other side I have been in the early stages (sickness stages) for ages.

Also, I am really sick of this stupid page....I will head on back to Aussie Mama in a few weeks, just after I announce to the people in my life about bubba, as I would not like them to read it on my site.


What I have eaten today...(that I shouldn't have).

A chocolate bar
A donut
A creamy yoghurty icecream thing
A handful of cashew nuts or 4
A hot chocolate or three (coffee makes me nauseous)
Some salty things....chips, crackers, salty tuna....
Lollies or candy or both
Thick warm slice of bread with real butter and hot jam....(see what a food whore I've become).
Must not eat like fat hungry cow or will become largest mammel to give birth in captivity...Also have developed aversion to weighing new 'in-baby-way' body.

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Am feeling v.v.v.shitty today as have annoying offspring, demanding and know-it-all husband...and have tiny little fetus in expanding womb. Am possibly heading to Guiness Book of Records for being woman with most annoying family, yet having more children.....Also am most upset as despite constant longing am now unable to indulge in life's greatest love.....Shiraz. As result will redirect desires to refridgerator...with particular attention to chocolate drawer (as have created entire drawer dedicated only to foods with cocoa bean origin)..Will possibly rename site Aussie Chocolate.

Have been unable to write for compelling reasons.

Guess reason I was unable to attend blog for so long:

a. I was illegally imprisoned in Greek God type man's apartment
b. I was in prison for imprisoning above mentioned Greek God
c. I am pregnant and cursed with waves of sickness and ill repute
d. I was busy with uni and kids
e. All of the above

Must go now as can hear Greek God stirring in his cupboard.

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

Have developed v.nasty habit of consuming red wine when faced with prospect of evening study (aka boring bitch lifestyle). As such, all fanciful thoughts of William Shakespeare are replaced by fanciful thoughts of firemen and other fine specimens. Will look into possibility of changing degree to 'men studies', as have noticed university offers 'women studies' counterpart.

Also Kari left for camp today, therefore I was forced to place several hundred post-it stickers around abode, so as not to forget her pick up date, as am prone to forgetting teenager when mentioned teen is not in immediate vicinity.

Sunday, April 03, 2005

Am in state of absolute shock and dismay, as Annie has found new pleasure in removing her nappy (diaper) and trotting around the house with no pants. As such, am on high alert and contstantly on lookout for any unwelcome deposits.

Also am v.nervous as am forced to conduct speech (aka public humiliation) about course readings, at university lecture. Reasons I am nervous:

I am worried the whole class will notice I am the only person over 30 on campus (aside from professors and grounds keepers).
I am worried entire class will think I am stupid as well as old
I am worried entire class will notice I haven't actually done the readings.

Despite best intentions, was unable to study on weekend, as Johnnie subjected whole neighbourhood to electric guitar practice with no headphones. Also Kari and Jerome decided to rent every movie from video store and then complain when they couldn't hear them.

Am v.annoyed, as selfish family are pushing me closer to gorging on scotch finger biscuits and subsequently regaining forgotten ass.

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Am most excited as James the fireman brought his son for play over with Johnnie. On seeing him arrive in driveway was sent into instant panic as had not straightened hair, so possibly resembled wild & unruly bush animal. Despite curly haired set back was v.pleased as shared coffee and chat with James.

Also was able to show off my new ass.Unfortunately, Professor Mofo is in good health again and has asked me to present reading to class next week, will consider feigning tropical illness so as to avoid any further degradation.

Annie woke no less than 10 times in 10 hour period. As such cannot possibly be expected to stay awake during despised professor's lecture.

Have upped exercise routine, due to over consumption of all things chocolate.

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Pleasing Me

    1. Red Wine....with a hues of blackberry and cherry.
    2. The very thought of scotch finger biscuits.
    3. My new ass.
    4. Chocolate.
    5. The thought of Annie wearing her pants.


    I'm Aussie Shiraz...and I'm a whole lot of woman...well I try.

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