Have developed v.nasty habit of consuming red wine when faced with prospect of evening study (aka boring bitch lifestyle). As such, all fanciful thoughts of William Shakespeare are replaced by fanciful thoughts of firemen and other fine specimens. Will look into possibility of changing degree to 'men studies', as have noticed university offers 'women studies' counterpart.

Also Kari left for camp today, therefore I was forced to place several hundred post-it stickers around abode, so as not to forget her pick up date, as am prone to forgetting teenager when mentioned teen is not in immediate vicinity.

Am in state of absolute shock and dismay, as Annie has found new pleasure in removing her nappy (diaper) and trotting around the house with no pants. As such, am on high alert and contstantly on lookout for any unwelcome deposits.

Also am v.nervous as am forced to conduct speech (aka public humiliation) about course readings, at university lecture. Reasons I am nervous:

I am worried the whole class will notice I am the only person over 30 on campus (aside from professors and grounds keepers).
I am worried entire class will think I am stupid as well as old
I am worried entire class will notice I haven't actually done the readings.

Despite best intentions, was unable to study on weekend, as Johnnie subjected whole neighbourhood to electric guitar practice with no headphones. Also Kari and Jerome decided to rent every movie from video store and then complain when they couldn't hear them.

Am v.annoyed, as selfish family are pushing me closer to gorging on scotch finger biscuits and subsequently regaining forgotten ass.